Last post

Well this is gonna be my last post here at Doula mom, after almost a year of posting and loving it i have come to realize my passion isn’t just birthing, this blog has taken on new life with all aspecs of growing and raising children. from birth itself and my experiance as a doula, to the choices i make as a doula. and so i have decided to start a new blog that is a mix of this one and another blog i write. All the posts here have been exported and imported in the new blog called Intentional Motherhood please check it out and update your blog rolls and feeds! I will continue to post all things birth related at  Intentional Motherhood
 as well as on BabyOhm.

Thank you for all your support this last year and i look forward to our new more intentional blogging relationship.

lent follow-up

so the last week hasn’t been as good as i woulda liked but i didn’t get in some good prayer time and have been reading my helpmeet book. these weeks them is to be thankful so i’m working on that……

I’m thankful for a husband who takes care of his son, who helps with the diaper changes, meals, packing diaper bags, and putting baby down all to make my life a little easier. 

I’m thankful for parents who have given us a place to stay while we sorted out finances and waited out my husbands hours being cut.

I’m thankful my husband has a job to go to.

I’m thankful i have a place to go with amazing Godly women on Tuesdays.

I’m thankful for God, my church.

I’m thankful for my boy especially when he pushes me to the max with his lack of nap cause that is when he is also the sweetest full of hugs and kisses!

I’m thankful for the discomfort i feel right now because it means i’ve been blessed with the privilege to grow a baby.

I’m thankful for this blog because it means i have a mind that i am expanding (reading and sharing what i know about birth, mothering, God)

I’m thankful for so much more but now i am tired and headed off to bed or to sew I don’t know I just know today was one of those no nap days and i need some mommy time.

New stats on Home births

The CDC this week released the stats on home and birth center births from 1990 to 2006. Their data showed a rise of 5% from 1990 to 2005. The stats also showed an 18% increase in midwife attended out of hospital births (which is important because it shows the home births were planned and not accidental). 

I did read a post on these stats over at NPR which i only share because it mentioned who recommends and doesn’t recommend home birth. the article points out that the the American college of Obstetrician and Gynecologists and the American Medical Association are both opposed to non hospital births. Not shocking since an out of hospital birth is money out of their pockets more or less. However the American college of nurse Midwives does support out of hospital births for low-risk women (again makes sense). but what i found positive is that the WHO (World Health Organization) also supports out of hospital for LOW-RISK women. 

Its posititve to know that while out of hospital isn’t best for everyone, if you are low risk and desire it the options are there and the education is getting out there. I can’t wait to see the stats the CDC releases next time as they will cover the time when movies like The business of the being born has been released and more education/information are becoming available. Not to mention the word of mouth of the many moms who are choosing their personalized birth experiance and not the medical.

update on baby levi

Today was our 34 week check up with our midwife (who by the way thanks to tons of prayers insurance is going to cover!!!). Anyway she confirmed he is breach and so she wants us to get started on trying to get him turned. (which we had kinda already started around here) So we are in for an intense couple of weeks at the chiropractor on the inversion table, along with going to the acupunctureist on monday to start on herbal pressure point process. Everyone seems really optimistic we are starting early (most OBs wait until your 36 weeks to even think about it) and he still has a ton of water around him meaning he has lots of room to turn!!! Then on the 15th we have our next apt and if he is still breech then we will schedule an e-version, which means we will go to a high risk OB and he will manually try to turn the baby. But he won’t do that until the baby is 37 weeks. so we are praying that he can hold out that long if he decides not to turn. (March 27th we will be exactly 37 weeks)

I don’t want my children to be happy

 A friend recommended this post titled “I don’t want my children to be happy“. the post was so touching! It reminded me so much of things i myself have said to family and friends when confronted about our choices to have children early, close together, and not to put a limit on kids.

I have often heard the comment that we won’t be able to give our kids what they want, or something to that effect. But in the end that doesn’t matter to us. We are not worried about being able to buy our kids all brand new clothing, a brand new car, or even covering every cent of their college tuition. We were each blessed with different gifts from our families and our parents are still blessing us today by providing and helping when and where they can. And we hope to be able to do the same for our kids. But we have no intention of every meeting their every want in an effort to make sure they live happy lives! Nope that is not in our plan as parents. 

As parents our plan for our kids is to give them what they need, and to help them find out who God desires them to be and to teach them to serve him. We feel by doing that, that they will live full lives, lives where they know their value and they know the value of the people around them and none of that value will be tied up in money or material possessions. Sure they are going to have to make sacrifices as will we, and they aren’t going to be very happy when they find out they have to chip in for gas in their car and help with the payments but 10 years down the line when they are living on their own they will appreciate the lessons in budget and finances that they learned from that car. And besides all that our lord didn’t take the easy route he himself made sacrifices and he himself was the ultimate sacrifice so that we could live lives of much greater happiness and purpose.

I hope to instill that in my children and not some kind of happiness that is fleeting and will be gone when that dollar is spent.

Awards

So I won 3 blogging awards this week! how fun is that!! All three were given to me by an awesome Midwife in training and one of my favorite twitter friends Kacey, whose blog I recommend checking out (she keeps up much better than me and always has great things to share). Thank you Kacey!!!

Anyway the awards i got were…

In which in return for winning i have to share 7 facts about myself and nominate 7 other blogs…

So the facts: 

1. i love sit-ups and crunches. I don’t know why but i love them!!! i always have it must have stemed from my hip hop teacher when i was 10 who made us do tons at the beginning of class.

2. i love to travel, and take the subway in foreign countries. the best was Italy where i couldn’t read the subway map but still managed to find my way.

3. I literally did Rome in a day. I know they say it’s not possible but i did it! i visited very major tourist attraction and walked the entire city in one day!!! it was not enough though i can’t wait to go back some day.

4. I met my husband while on a missions trip with our church and i thought there is no way I’d ever date that guy I’m not his type/style but he’s cute. Turns out he decided to go on the trip i was going because he thought I was cute!

5. I love hot things Hot! and cold things Cold! hence my obsession with Ice cubes. I must have ice in my drink at all times unless its hot chocolate (that’s the only hot drink I drink). 

6. I don’t like lights. like overhead lighting. it annoys me i prefer lamps and i hate the new bulbs i like the old yellowish glow ones. I’m all for softer lighting.

7. I love Metallica! 

(my 7 nominees are to come)

Rules: Accept award, and link and thank the one who nominated you for it. then pass along to 15 other blogs that you’ve newly discovered. (Nominees to come!)

and Award #3

Rules for the sunshine award: Accept, thank, share, and pass only to 12 bloggers.

Thanks Kacey for the awesome awards and now to pass them along….. And in the same nature as the previous recipients everyone gets all 3 awards!!! (and FYI its a mix of crafters and birth bloggers because for those that don’t know when I’m not at a birth or reading birth stuff i am busy crafting/sewing away!)

1. Because she is so crafty and Giving! This momma makes stuff

2. Because she has a heart after God! My Happily Ever After

3. Because these are the stories that need to be told! the Perils of Hospital Birth

4. and these are the practitioners we need to stay away from! My OB said What!

5. not because she gave them to me but because she truly fits all 3 and she is so awesome to share her expertise! Hearts and Hands

6. Because she is one talented, green, multi-tasking mommy! Jesi Haack weddings

7. Another Talented Mommy! Mary Janes and Galoshes

8. Because she inspires me! Ruffles and Stuff

9. Because she fights for birth! Momotics

10. Because its helpful information on Natural parenting! Nature Moms

11. Because she is one smart lady with an awesome store!  The Belly Sprout

12. and because she keeps me sane! Alysia juanita

Time mag and cutting the cord

I read an article recently on Time.com about cutting the cord too soon. 

There are many reasons to delay cord cutting such as the baby gets off of his/her blood, there is less of a risk of anemia as baby, and baby receives more stem cells and an increase of antibodies from mom. But here is a new reason to delay cord cutting particularly in premature and cesarean babies; Its called “Respiratory distress syndrome.” RDS is the failure of baby’s lungs to expand properly

The article shares that most babies suffering from RDS are born premature, caesarean, or born of diabetic mothers. However, in the study discussed 129 babies were looked at. 41 had their umbilical cords clamped before their second breath, of those 21 experienced RDS. of the 52 babies the cords were clamped after and only 6 showed the same symptoms. concluding that a delay in cutting cord diminishes the possibility of RDS. The doctors are relating this to the “gradual change from fetal to regular circulation without putting stress on blood vessels in the lungs..”

The thought that my baby could be more at risk for fetal death due to RDS simply because the doctor rushed to cut his cord is a little nerve-racking to me. I wish i had known this the first time around especially since my son was a month early. But now I know, so when number 2 gets here I’ll be sure to delay cutting his cord. 

Need more reasons to delay cord clamping? Here are a few (taken from empoweredchildbirth.com):

“Deprivation of placental blood results in a relatively large loss of iron to the infant.” (1)

“Placental blood acts as a source of nourishment that protects infants against the breakdown of body protein.” (1)

“Studies have shown that immediate cord clamping prolongs the average duration of the third stage and greatly increases maternal blood loss.” (4)

“In order to give the newborn the blood that it need(s), physiologically cord clamping should be performed not immediately after birth. One should wait … until the umbilical vein has been empty and is collapsed.” (5)

“Normal blood volume is not produced by a cord clamp … Many neonatal morbidities such as the hyperviscosity syndrome, infant respiratory distress syndrome, anemia, and hypovolemia correlate with early clamping. To avoid injury in all deliveries, especially those of neonates at risk, the cord should not be clamped until placental transfusion is complete.” (2)

Early cord clamping may also be at least partly responsible for many of the cases of blood sensitization in Rh factor negative mothers, considering the blood is clamped off with enough force to create a brief “backflow” of the infant’s blood into the mother’s placental “wound.” 

Given all of this information why would you clamp the cord, why not let it keep pulsing? Even in the case of a newborn who has been delivered via c-section for whatever reason (emergent or not) or the one who needs medical attention, why deny them their complete blood supply and all the benefits that come with that umbilical blood, couldn’t that blood help save their life? 

Its food for thought I guess…….

God moment

So i had one of those really bad/good parenting moments. you know the kind where your left with a warmed heart but it was at the hand of you being an idiot. 

I’m a yeller, i just am, i know it, i work on it but when my buttons are pushed I always end up yelling. and yesterday i had had enough! Harvey is cutting a molar and is just fussy, and by the end of the day all he wanted was his daddy and his daddy was off doing something that was in and of itself a frusteration for me. and So the whining just pressed my buttons. I was tired and not feeling well and i couldn’t take it anymore and so i was yelling for my husband and begging my son to stop. which he did for a second before starting in again. I looked at him and i loudly (not quite yelling loud but loudly) pleased “PLLLLLEEASE Harvey STOP!!!!!” and then i barried my head in my hands hoping he would and feeling defeated. 

And then came that moment! the moment only God could ordain. My son instead of crying for being snapped at as he had been doing all day. Stopped what he was doing, came over to me. climbed in my lap and gave me the biggest hug!

It melted me and humbled me. I hugged him back and thanked him for the hug. I apologized for snapping and told him how much i loved him. 

The whole thing just blew me away, here i am mom totally loosing it and here is my 14 month old who can’t really say a whole lot of words but yet he comprehended enough of that moment to know that mommy needed a hug really bad.

What a blessing and what a tangible example of God’s love!

Lent

Lent is upon us and again i am at a loss for what to give up. for two Years in a row i have been wanting to do a food fast (i did one a few years ago for 40 days and it really helped put things into prospective for me) but again i find myself in a position where i can’t do a food fast. So i’ve been racking my brain left and right trying to decide what is it that keeps me from God. Sure it would be great to do a spending fast like i read about on our RockHarbor nurture blog (to which i am not a contributor). But given the way things are for us right now, $ is not the thing that keeps me from God. No the thing that keeps me from him is my time. 

Given the last 6 months and all the downsides to it i have thrown myself into projects to make me feel better and to occupy my mind rather than throw myself into prayer. and so for Lent i am giving up my time.

what does that mean exactly? Right now the way my day goes Nap time is mommy time and all other time is Harvey time (chores are done during harvey time and bills are bed jsut before bed time, and Hubby time is well his day’s off) So for lent i am going to be intentional about devoting an hour a day to God. It may not be the same time everyday but there will be a set hour aside for prayer and word. To keep me accountable i am going to post about God’s hour on my blog. It may just be a sentence or two but i will post about it to hold myself accountable sacrificing my time for the God who gave his whole life for me!

What are you giving up for lent?

OB interview

the last 2 months my husband and i have been faced with the fun challenge of deciding who to continue prenatal care with and how to appeal the insurance company for the coverage we desire.

midwives are covered under our plan and back when we got prego the midwife of our choice was covered in network, we were so excited! i even called 3 times to confirm what the insurance company covered and what part we would pay to be reassured each time it would be the same cost as if we went to the OB. So we went with the midwife, So excited!!!! Then december came and when i went to get it in writing that the birth center was covered we learned the midwife had been dropped from the network! not even the midwife knew!!! So we started the process of filling out the paperwork but also preparing for the possibility that we may need to transfer care to an OB.

So we made some calls and finally a couple weeks ago found an OB that said she would take me. so we scheduled an apt with her in march. Then last week i was sick so the doctors in her office peaked their heads in on me all week and then i met with her this week for a follow-up and our first prenatal. 

OH MAN! let’s say we will not be staying with her. Thankfully she was honest with us and told me that she didn’t think our birthing philosophies would line up. but how she told me that was so uncalled for! She was rather rude and told me she couldn’t understand why anyone would choose a homebirth. She told me that she knows more about birth and basically that she would know how to manage my labor better than i would (even though i already know what my body does in labor). but the conversation ended well and we came to an agreement that as long as in the interventions were necessary and she could prove to me that they were than she wouldn’t get an argument for me, she seemed to respect that and so we were good to go and she agreed to treat me. 

So we continued on with our prenatal, where she seemed rather shock that i was had received full care from my midwife But none the less we went on and she told me that second births are usually faster. I smiled and said i know that’s what scares me! I told her how fast my first was and how it was painless. i told her i really didn’t feel anything until i was already in transition, even though the nurse could see what she called intense contractions on the  monitors. So here comes the part the reason we won’t be staying with her… Her response was “Well in that case i don’t know how to advice you, so I would recommend inducing” 

WHAT!?!?! How is that Medically necessary? because you are scared of natural labor, and because i will most likely show up ready to push and cutting it close like i did the first time around, you want to induce labor? CRAZY!

That was my first personal interaction with an OB who truly didn’t trust the body and the women to do what she was made to do and it shocked me! So we are back to praying for our insurance to cover our midwife and birth center. And a valuable lesson is learned, first apt with any OB…… question about their birthing philosophies. Its nice to think that they will agree to their birth plan and they may say ok but when it comes down to it, their recommendations may be different.